The First
by Last Fighting Dreamer
Summary: What am I supposed to do to make you look at me? Perhaps just say the truth, perhaps just walk away. Are we bound to live our lives loving but not being loved back? IzaPsy


_Some people say that we should look away from people we know will hurt us. Some people advise other people to ignore everything that will cause harm._

_However, there are people who do exactly the opposite._

"Iza-chan!"

_There are people who live their lives looking for pain._

The pink eyed boy gave his genuine smile.

_Even if they don't realize it._

He got closer and started ranting about how his day had been, trying to attract the other's attention.

_People like you, Psyche._

* * *

**The First**

* * *

Psyche was walking happily along the road, humming a song under his breath. After buying himself some sweets and ootoro for the other man, he headed to Shinjuku. On his way, he stopped as he heard loud noises and soon he could see signs being thrown on the air – he sighed.

_Shizuo-kun should calm down. He gets angry so easily…_

He slowly turned away, ready to go back to Izaya's apartment, not noticing the frown on his own face.

"Iza-chan, I'm back!" the raven announced, coming inside "I bought you ootoro!"

Izaya finished putting on his coat, turning to the other "I'm about to head out, Psyche."

Said man blinked, his tone lowering "What are you going to do?"

"Work," the Orihara shrugged "But thank you anyway."

Psyche looked away, he knew what was going on.

"You're going to Ikebukuro, aren't you?"

"What if I am?" the man replied, an eyebrow arched.

The pink eyed boy sighed, letting the bag with the ootoro on the closest table "I saw Shizuo-kun on my way here. You shouldn't go there today."

"I'm not scared of Shizu-chan, Psyche," the man kept staring at the other, while Psyche looked at everywhere but him.

"You might get hurt…"

"You can't live without getting hurt."

_You should know that well._

"It doesn't mean you need to get hurt on purpose!" he then turned to Izaya, his eyes showing he was concerned.

"Heh," the man stepped closer, his signature smirk on its place "Are you saying you don't believe in me or my skills? You're the one hurting me here, Psyche."

"I'm just worried about you!" he raised his voice.

"Yeah, yeah…" he soon changed his tone "I don't need a babysitter."

_I know that face._

Psyche was clearly frustrated, not sure of what to reply.

_You want to hit me and curse, you want to go away and never come back._

His expression soon softened into a sad one, lowering his head.

_But you bite your lip and keep quiet. _

"I don't want you to get hurt…" he whispered.

_No matter how much I hurt you, you're the one who hurt yourself the most._

"We can't always get what we want."

"Can you stop talking like this?" the pink eyed boy raises his head, his saddened expression still on its place "I'm serious."

"So am I," he replied simply and headed towards the door, only to be stopped as the man pulled him back by the wrist.

"Don't go."

"Why should I listen to you?"

The man remained silent.

"You don't have a reason? That's pathetic, Psyche."

His grip on the other's wrist tightened as Izaya smirked.

_I'm making it easier for you. _

"I don't have all day, you know."

_I'm giving you a chance._

Psyche let go and lowered his head once more "How many people have confessed to you?"

The Orihara blinked "A lot," he looked away "I doubt any of them actually meant it though."

Before Izaya could realize it, the other had taken his hand and raised his head, now looking at him "May I be the first one?"

"That's not the kind of thing you ask someone."

"And that's not an answer."

The other sighed "Isn't asking that already a confession?"

Psyche shook his head "It's not because you know I love you that I have told you that."

Izaya took his hand away from the other's "Now you have."

The pink eyed boy gave a bitterly smile "I guess so."

"What did you expect me to say? That I love you back?"

Once again, the man shook his head "That's impossible, isn't it?" he looked away "I would never expect something like that."

"Then what?"

"Someone told me once that regardless from the person who does it, it makes people happy when someone else confesses to them…" he tilted his head, a fake smile gracing his features "I can't say they're right since no one has ever loved me but," he paused, turning his head to look at the other "All I wanted was to make you at least a bit happy. But I guess I failed that."

Izaya stared as the pink eyed man simply walked out, hiding his forming tears without another word.

He got closer to the table where the ootoro lay on, noticing it was from his favorite store.

_You're an idiot for loving someone like me._

Taking off his coat, he decided not to go to Ikebukuro after all.

_But it did make me happy, idiot._

* * *

_I may be good enough for you in another life_


End file.
